Welcome back!
Interpreting Your Couples Health Check
A structured way to make sense of what you’re seeing —
without jumping to conclusions.
You’ve just taken a closer look at different areas of your relationship.
This page helps you interpret patterns, not label your relationship as “good” or “bad”.
What matters here is not the score — but what feels stable, and what keeps creating friction.
Before You Dive In
A few important things to keep in mind:
This check-up is not a diagnosis.
You don’t need to “fix” anything after reading this.
Clarity doesn’t require immediate action.
Some couples use this reflection simply as a mirror.
Others realise that certain topics deserve more attention.
Both are valid.
How to Read Your Results
Instead of beginning with challenges, start by identifying your strengths.
Look at the areas where you and your partner answered similarly and feel mostly aligned.
These are not “nothing special” — they are real resources, especially during stressful phases.
Take a moment to write down 3–5 aspects of your relationship that currently feel supportive or solid.
Instead of beginning with challenges, start by identifying your strengths.
Look at the areas where you and your partner answered similarly and feel mostly aligned.
These are not “nothing special” — they are real resources, especially during stressful phases.
Take a moment to write down 3–5 aspects of your relationship that currently feel supportive or solid.
These areas reflect deeper layers of compatibility — values, priorities, emotional and physical closeness.
Differences here don’t automatically mean a relationship is “wrong”, but they often require conscious attention.
You may want to pause and take a closer look if:
you strongly disagree in several of these areas, or
you find yourselves at opposite ends repeatedly, or
the same topics keep resurfacing without resolution.
Especially for couples living abroad or preparing a move, unresolved tensions in these areas tend to intensify under stress.
These areas reflect deeper layers of compatibility — values, priorities, emotional and physical closeness.
Differences here don’t automatically mean a relationship is “wrong”, but they often require conscious attention.
You may want to pause and take a closer look if:
you strongly disagree in several of these areas, or
you find yourselves at opposite ends repeatedly, or
the same topics keep resurfacing without resolution.
Especially for couples living abroad or preparing a move, unresolved tensions in these areas tend to intensify under stress.
These areas relate to organisation, responsibilities, and everyday coordination.
Differences here are often easier to negotiate — but if left unaddressed, they can quietly drain energy and goodwill.
If you notice recurring friction here, it’s often less about the topic itself and more about how decisions are made and communicated.
These areas relate to organisation, responsibilities, and everyday coordination.
Differences here are often easier to negotiate — but if left unaddressed, they can quietly drain energy and goodwill.
If you notice recurring friction here, it’s often less about the topic itself and more about how decisions are made and communicated.
These categories reflect how you stay connected in everyday life —
sharing information, talking about your day, and having space for real conversations.
When these areas feel strained, couples often report a sense of emotional distance —
even if there is no major conflict.
These categories reflect how you stay connected in everyday life —
sharing information, talking about your day, and having space for real conversations.
When these areas feel strained, couples often report a sense of emotional distance —
even if there is no major conflict.
These categories focus on how you interact when things are difficult.
Patterns like defensiveness, escalation, or difficulty repairing after conflict are common —
especially under stress or repeated transitions.
Noticing these patterns is not about blame.
It’s about understanding what happens when the pressure is on.
These categories focus on how you interact when things are difficult.
Patterns like defensiveness, escalation, or difficulty repairing after conflict are common —
especially under stress or repeated transitions.
Noticing these patterns is not about blame.
It’s about understanding what happens when the pressure is on.
The idea for this health-checkup comes from Paula Hall, psychotherapist and author of “Improve your relationship for Dummies” (Wiley), combined with questionnaires from relationship happiness and longevity research that has been done by John and Julie Gottman (Gottman Institute).
This self-check is for informational and reflective purposes only and does not replace therapy, diagnosis, or medical treatment.
What comes next - if anything
Gaining clarity doesn’t automatically mean you need to act right away.
Some couples sit with these insights for a while.
Others notice that certain questions feel too loaded or perpetual to sort out alone.
If you’d like support sorting through what stands out here,
I offer a one-time conversation focused on orientation — not on fixing or deciding anything.
A conversation to make sense of it
In this 30–45 minute conversation, we slow things down,
look at your situation together,
and clarify what actually matters right now — and what doesn’t.
Prefer a guided walkthrough?
If you’d rather listen than read, you can watch a short 10-min. video
where I walk through the interpretation in more depth.
This is entirely optional. The written guide above is complete on its own.
If you feel ready to take a closer look at what matters now,
I offer a one-time conversation for orientation.
Hi there, I am Wiebke!
I work with expat couples and individuals who are navigating change, pressure, and important decisions — often without a clear sense of what’s actually wrong.
My work is structured, relational, and focused on helping people regain clarity without turning complexity into a problem in itself.
HELP4LOVE Relationship Coaching & Mediation
© 2026 Wiebke Anton | Help4Love